Why are constantly hating on ourselves in photos?

We all have moments of self-doubt—especially when it comes to seeing ourselves in photos. If you’ve ever looked at a gallery of images and felt disappointed with how you look, you’re not alone.

As a photographer, I see this all the time—women (yes, it’s usually women) being incredibly hard on themselves.

If you’ve ever picked apart a photo of yourself, you might wonder—why am I my own worst critic? The truth is, there are both psychological and societal reasons why women, in particular, struggle with self-acceptance in images.

We see ourselves differently than others do

There’s something called the mere-exposure effect, which means we’re more comfortable with the version of ourselves we see most often—our reflection. Since mirrors flip our image, photos can look “off” to us because they don’t match what we’re used to seeing. But to everyone else, your photos are how they always see you!

Society’s unrealistic beauty standards

From a young age, women are bombarded with unattainable beauty ideals in advertising, social media, and entertainment. When we see our natural selves in a photo—without heavy Instagram filters—it can feel like we don’t measure up. But the truth is, real, unfiltered beauty is what truly connects with people.

The brain’s negativity bias

Negativity bias—focusing on what’s “wrong” rather than what’s right—was useful for survival in the past, but when it comes to photos, it makes us zoom in on tiny perceived flaws…instead of appreciating the overall beauty of the image.

Personal experiences shape our perception

Comments we’ve heard about our appearance—whether from family, media, or past experiences—can stick with us. If you’ve ever been told you’re “not photogenic” or someone criticized a feature, those words can echo in your mind for years, even though they don’t reflect reality.

4 Tips to Help You See Your Photos in a New Light

1. Stop Looking at Them (For Now)

If your first reaction is negative, give yourself space. Constantly revisiting the photos will only reinforce those feelings. Take a break and let your emotions settle before looking again.

2. Take a Two-Week Break

Step away from the gallery for at least two weeks. When you return, your mindset will be clearer, and you might see the images in a different way.

3. Find Your Favorites

When you’re ready, go through your gallery and pick 2-5 photos you truly love. Focus on those first! You don’t have to love every image, but finding a couple that make you feel good is a great start.

4. Revisit the Full Gallery in 4-6 Months

Over time, your perspective shifts. A few months from now, go back and look at the full set of photos again. You may be surprised at how many more images you now appreciate!

A gentle reminder about your brand photos

Your brand photos are about more than just how you look. Great brand photos capture the experience of working with you. Your audience isn’t zooming in on flaws—they’re connecting with the personality, confidence, and authenticity you bring to your business.

So, give yourself grace. Over time, you may start seeing your photos—and yourself—through a kinder, more appreciative lens.

Feeling nervous, but want to get in front of the camera?

Brand mini sessions are a great way to get started! Sign up HERE and you’ll get info about the next Brand Mini Day.